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| The women on the track there might be fit for baby sitting, who would hire her? |
Zombies are those creatures that indicate the end of the world, potentially. They seem to have an urge to seek out brains or the living, so there are a few that are safe, (maybe they are dead ... don't judge). Some say that the day they walk the earth is just a matter of time, So today OddballGreg and myself will tell you how to survive the zombie apocalypse.
Now the beginning scenario was created by both OddballGreg and myself and we are both using it and expanding on it independently. It is a rather crude scenario one of which just might take place, (you never know). So without further delay here is the gruesome and rather morbid survival, (the Italics are what we both begin with):
Having managed to accurately dress myself with the correct clothing in the correct orientation after one or two tries, I gather up my usual trinkets like keys, phone, wallet, sunglasses, etc, and make my way outside to drive to work. (Yes. Drive. This is South Africa after all. Walking to work can take several hours, not minutes.) my tiredness making me fairly oblivious to my surroundings, I don't find the lack of cars on the road strange in the least, despite it being the middle of the week. “Maybe school term has finished?” I reason, that being a common cause for a lack of traffic.
Whatever the cause, I soon arrive at work, enter, and make my way over to note my entry time when I notice, strangely, that everyone is already clocked in. Must be something happening today that I wasn't told about, the lack of updates on the noticeboard showing everyone is probably somewhere else and hasn't had the time to sort things out here. Suddenly, my phone rings to tell me that I have a new message. Pulling it out of my pocket with a large yawn, I drop it in some ketchup that someone must've spilt on the floor at some point, I remove it and go to wipe it off in the bathroom, wondering at the laziness of my coworkers for not cleaning up after themselves.
Wiped and cleaned, I check who sent the message. It’s from OddballGreg, pressing the conversation to see what they said, I suddenly wonder how much he’s been drinking since his spelling is really bad. “Stsy hme, zomurs apixoltse.” Asking them to repeat what they said, I put my phone away and go to find out what work you need to do today.
Walking into the next room, I find a bunch of scared individuals looking around and throwing various things into bags while one watches the doorways while holding a cricket bat. Noticing me, the blonde haired guy with the cricket bat and something red on his white shirt’s breast pocket walks up to me and says: “Bloody hell man, I thought you were one of them.”
“One of who?” I ask incredulously.
“The zombies. Have you been walking around with your eyes closed man? They're all over the place. Listen, now’s not the time to explain. We're busy getting some food and stuff right. After that the plan is we'll go to me’ mum’s place, kill her husband who’s been bitten, drive through to the local pub, batten down the hatches, sip a beer and wait for all this to blow over. Sound good?”
Me, deciding that I've seen this movie before and that the noob with red on him clearly has no idea what he’s talking about and is probably going to get me unceremoniously killed in some pub somewhere, decide to come up with my own plan to survive:
So, since I have not noticed the events before, I ask a the group of 3 for their names and how it all started and any information that might help us survive. One of the gentleman said, "My name is Trace. I heard on the news that it was some or other diseases or infection that spread when a scientist was doing an experiment without proper preparation." Another person with a rather high voice said, "Yes! I heard that as well. My name is Rose by the way." I was astounded, she didn't really look like a female, since she was wearing rather torn up jeans and long sleeve shirt which was really dirty, which is rather different to the skirts and and skimpy tops you often see.
"Ok, so it is soem or other diseases. What are some of the things you 3 can do that can save our posteriors if the time comes to it," I ask. The man who had the blood stain on his short pocket answer, " My name is Nick, I am an ex-prisoner, I am rather good with sub-machine guns, and I know how to swing a bat." Rose interjects Nick and says, "Posterior, are you an english speaker or something?"
"No, I just tend to use rather obscure words, but there is no time for that. We need to get supplies, what do you have so far." "I have a baseball bat, we have some office supplies, and some food from the kitchen down the hall," said Nick.
"Nick, since you were in prison, do you know where the nearest gunshop is?" "Just because I was in prison does not mean I know where a gunshop is ... it's two blocks down." "Ok, awesome. Oh and my name is Jerome. I have my car parked outside, lets take that to the shop and stock up on some much needed equipment. Lets take whatever we can from here and be on our way." Once we left the office, I had my first whiff of what smelled like a dying animal. After arriving at the Gun shop, we scavenged around taking what ammunition and guns we could. Breaking the class that was between us and some of the weapons.
"There is a safe that I cannot get into. Does anyone know how to crack a safe?" asked Rose. "I might be able to help, depending on what type of safe it is. Wait, lets just search on the net for it. I have my phone with me ... just give me a sec. It is a turn wheel safe." "Yip" "Ok this one website says we need to try and bounce the safe." "Jerome ... It is a walk in safe. You can try if you want, but no. Try something else." Nick disappeared for a bit but none of us noticed. When he came back his pockets looked bulgy. He said really calmly, "everyone just wait outside for a second please." "Why?" we all 3 asked. "Trust me, just wait out side for a bit." We proceeded outside, and Nick was out shortly after, He said "Cover your ears now." We all did and then a loud BANG!!! came from inside, followed by a cloud of smoke. "What did you do man??? are you crazy?" "Relax, Jerome. There was a police station a block up, I got a duffel bag of weapons, along with some grenades." "Zombies are attracted to sound you id10t. We need to move now!" We had managed to get some of the weapons from the safe, with a not destroyed entrance. After we had loaded everything into the boot/trunk of the car, zombies started to chase after us.
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| If we lived in the game Unturned, these would be the zombies chasing us. |
We all got in the car as fast as possible and started to discuss some of the places we could rest, or even better a place to barricade as a safe house. We all agreed that the mall was the worst place since that is where a lot of the zombies are seen to congregate. Parents were also a bad place to go, since they most probably have been turned and you don't want to see loved ones as zombies, they could give you a hug ... then bite off our ear. We decided to go to an old metal factory since there would be a lot of supplies for defences. After getting there we saw a few zombies on the ground. "We have to exterminate them. Remember Rule #1 - double Tap" After a few hours of zombie hunting, we had the problem of the bodies laying around.
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| When playing Shotgun Fun Fun you can expect a lot of blood, if you survive long enough |
In the factory we managed to find a full body heat resistant suit, that would have been used to handle or check things close to the melted metal. We used this suit to move all the now re-dead bodies away from the factory so we can start preparations on the defences. We used metal sheets to block up all the windows and all but 2 entrances. When then made sure that these defences would hold in the case of emergency. Once we were safely locked in for the night, we decide to get to know each other around the campfire. As it turned out, Nick was in prison due to the fact he never paid any of his parking tickets, he broke out of prison when some of the guards were turned into zombies and utter chaos broke, however he was a gun enthusiast, and enjoyed hunting. Rose was a really open minded but spoke her mind all the time, if you crossed her you would be as good as ... a zombie. Trace was a military sniper, and was here on vacation when all of this started and lost his wife to the infection. I must have been asleep for the entire week since I hadn't noticed any of this until that day.
After sleeping through the night on the floor, we went out to try find beds, for better nights and supplies to survive in our safe house. "We must try stay in there as long as we can," stated Nick, while I said, "unless we try find other survivors. There might be some in other cities, look at me I survived without knowing about it for a few days." Rose looked rather confused now, "if we go out there, we will most probably die. If you want to risk your life on something like that, go ahead, but until we are much more prepared I am not leaving."
Me, being me, I wanted to find out if there was more survivors out there. So I let everyone know that I wanted to go out just for a day or two to see if there were any in the nearby towns. They were ok with me going, but did not want to come with, (who would have blamed them? Every time people do that in the movies they always get picked off one by one.) I gathered up some food and weapons and put them into a duffle bag, that was the dirtiest of them all. After stealing a car I went to a gas station to see if there was any fuel I can get. I started filling up my car when all of a sudden a zombie appeared right next to me, Thank goodness for Rule #1 - Cardio. I out ran the zombies, pulled a frying pan out of the car and had some batting practice.
Once I had filled up my car, I went to the mall ... to see if anyone was stupid enough to actually go there. I am to the entrance of Greenstone shopping center and then proceeded inwards. I noticed that one shop, Nandos, seemed to be barricaded so I inspected it. I found it strange that there were little amount of zombies in the mall. Once I was able to get around the barricades, I saw some movement in the back. A woman screamed and started running at me with a shotgun in her hand and pulled the trigger. I was shot in the head, the light faded in a matter of seconds and I was dead. I realized that I still had an extra life and respawned at the entrance to the center again. "Damn, never done that before. I must be really careful." I went back to Nandos and got around the barricades, this time I hid behind a pillar and shouted out, "Is there anyone there?" I heard 2 people quickly mutter and shot up from there chairs.
"Please don't shoot, I come in peace." "Who are you? have you been bitten?" "My name is Jerome, no I haven't. there are hardly any zombies out there, what happened to them all?" I slowly walked to the 2 people there with my hands up. The lady answered, "Hi, my name is Rochelle, we have managed to lure them to the other end of the center, but we couldn't do it with all of them, that is why we have the barricade." "My name is Bobby, but everyone calls me Coach." "Are there any other people here with you 2?" "No, it is just us, we thought there was no one else out there, so we stay here as much as we can." "I was with 3 other people in the town just down the road, if you want you can come and join us, more people, the better we can do things." Rochelle says, "That would be great, do you have a car, all the ones in the parking lot have been syphoned for our generator." "Yes, it is just out side, lets take as much as we can and head on back. I just need to eat something first." I go to the kitchen, and make myself something to eat. There were some canned tomatoes, and some mushrooms, I managed to find some rolls that were not quite steal and just put it all together. I quickly ate that, and we were on our way.
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| I may or may not have seen something from Plants vs. Zombies |
As the day progressed I started feeling strange again, I was turning into a zombie. I shouted, "Guys, I am turning, you have to kill me and take off my head, you have to stay safe." "But you were getting better." "We can't do that, you are part of our team." No-one wanted to do it. Nick came up to me, leant down and whispered into my ear "do you really want us to kill you? You might not survive." My response was, "Rule #17 Don't be a hero." With that, Nick had decided to do it. He went and got the machete from the back and said, "We will always remember you Jerome." With a quick swoop, the blade went through and made a ding, with the concrete below my head.
Suddenly I got a falling sensation and woke up in bed to the sound of my phone's alarm beside me. "It was all just a dream? It felt so real though. I guess that explains the respawn thing. I must stop playing CoD Zombies." After dressing myself for work after a few attempts, I gather my things and head for the car. Driving to work I notice that there are not many cars on the road despite it being the middle of the week, it must be school holiday I reason to myself.
I soon arrive at work and make my way to the front desk to clock in. I notice everyone else has already, must be something happening today that no-one told me about. My phone rings with a notification that I got a message. While pulling my phone out of my pocket with a yawn, it drops and lands in some ketchup/tomato sauce. Geez I mutter, After going to the bathroom to wash it, I realize that this was way too familiar. I start to shake and unlock my phone, the message it from OddballGreg. It says "stsy hme, zomurs apixoltse" ...
The End
I hope you enjoyed this special feature, of OddballGreg and I today. If you have any comments or any other storeys you would like us to read, please let us know about them in the comments below, and on Facebook/Twitter. If you know anyone who likes a zombie story or just likes to read, please share this post with them as I am sure they will thank you for it. If you like what you see and would like to see more, please like us on Facebook and/or follow us on Twitter using the associated buttons on the bar to the left, to see the latest posts, as they are published. I thank you for taking the time for reading today's posts, and I hope you have/had an awesome day.
Happy zombie hunting.
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